It has been a bit of a blur around here. I think I am finally back on my feet. The stomach flu left for good last Wednesday. The only word to describe how it ripped through our family is...NASTY. Isaac is now battling a coughy runny nose but that's a walk in the park. I'm still unpacking but mostly in the non essential areas. The learning room is up and running minus a few boxes of reading books. Feels good!
I feel as if my New Year is finally starting. Little time to reflect over the last six weeks has proven hard. I relish quiet time to ponder and be left with my thoughts. I look forward to returning to this on a regular basis as I know it helps my perspective in the day to day.
I have in snippets thought about this year..2010. In many places I have read people have "a word" for this year. Though not intentionally, I have been feeling that there is a word for me this year:
I want to grow on many levels in this area...within my own family, my church family and my community. I am one who is pretty content to be by myself. To the point that I see my oldest child desiring to be alone a little too much. She is inclined that way but also observes and hears my enjoyment of it. Though I believe it is how I recharge my batteries, I can also become quite selfish with it. This last year has been especially bad with the many struggles I have faced with my middle child. It was just easier to stay at home which fed that tendency.
I am not exactly sure what this will mean for us/me. One area I am working on changing is the time we spend in our community, which is at this point very little. Our church is in the process of doing more in mercy ministries so there will be opportunities provided. I also plan to have more people in my home on a regular basis. I so desire my children to look outward. Serving others is an influenced and learned choice. Left to ourselves we serve ourselves.
It is a fine balance between "needing" space and wanting it. Our culture influences us to take what we need, be good to ourselves, and convinces us we deserve a break. I do believe that each person is built differently and has different needs. I know for me there are many times when my choices are based solely on selfish desires and not a need. And the difficult part is I see the fruit of it in my own children. It's not what I want to teach them is the priority. I want Christ's example of laying His life down to be the main thing.
So this year is the year of re-evaluating my RELATING to God, my husband, my kids, my church, friends and community. Should be an interesting ride.
PS. Sorry, still no pictures. Haven't resolved the camera issue.