Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Eli's Story

The night before my c-section I couldn't sleep. I think I maybe slept 2 hours. I was awoke by a very busy little boy squirming inside my body. As I lay there feeling his movement my logic told me he had no clue that he would be seeing me face to face in about six hours. The romantic side of me thought, maybe he's having one last party before he emerges into the big wide open world. I do remember being purposeful and enjoying these lasts moments of internal movement. This would be the last night he would live inside my body and there was something special about that. It is most likely the last time a baby will ever move around inside my womb again.
So I lay there for a long time. My mind wondered over the last year. Just a year ago September we lost yet another baby to miscarriage, we sold all our baby stuff and thought we were done. We conceived Eli in January, our roof fell in February (The Bulge), I got uncontrollable morning sickness in March, we moved again in May, my husbands job and pay were up in the air in August and not to mention the constant battle with fear and worry over loosing this baby too. What a year!
But yet...What a God!
The year wasn't anything like what I thought it would be....but as I lay there this little boy kicking me I was overwhelmed with the kindness of God to order our lives according to His purpose, glory and our good. We had made it nine months.....we were in the home stretch and receiving the desires of our hearts however undeserved. What struck me so clearly was that God wasn't good because Eli was going to really be born healthy, but simply because that is who he is and how He deals with all that are His.
After no sleep but great anticipation we took off for the hospital at 5:45 am. It was a very strange feeling to know I was driving to meet my son for the first time. He had no clue! The c-section went brilliantly. It was so fast. Eli quacked like a duck when he first came out it was really funny. Then when I heard him scream I just started to cry tears of joy. He was here, he was healthy and he was mine. Trying to describe that moment would be pointless, relief and joy all mixed together.
I do recall a very special time right after recovery. My husband and Eli were at the nursery for something and I was alone in my room. This wave of gratefulness hit me and I was compelled to worship God out loud. I was so swallowed by God's mercy, kindness and grace at that moment. I spent the rest of my hospital stay meditating (between constant breastfeeding) on Psalm 145. God is truly great in all His ways!

Psalm 145
Great Is the Lord
A Song of Praise. Of David.
I will extol you, my God and King, and bless your name forever and ever.
Every day I will bless you and praise your name forever and ever.
Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and his greatness is unsearchable.
One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.
On the glorious splendor of your majesty, and on your wondrous works, I will meditate.
They shall speak of the might of your awesome deeds, and I will declare your greatness.
They shall pour forth the fame of your abundant goodness and shall sing aloud of your righteousness.
The Lord is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.
The Lord is good to all, and his mercy is over all that he has made.
All your works shall give thanks to you, O Lord, and all your saints shall bless you!
They shall speak of the glory of your kingdom and tell of your power, to make known to the children of man your mighty deeds, and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.
Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom,and your dominion endures throughout all generations.
[The Lord is faithful in all his words and kind in all his works]. The Lord upholds all who are falling and raises up all who are bowed down.
The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food in due season. You open your hand; you satisfy the desire of every living thing. The Lord is righteous in all his ways and kind in all his works.
The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desire of those who fear him; he also hears their cry and saves them. The Lord preserves all who love him, but all the wicked he will destroy. My mouth will speak the praise of the Lord, and let all flesh bless his holy name forever and ever.
Eli and I are both doing very well. My c-section recovery is going so much better then my last one. Not having an emergency section makes such a difference. Eli nurses like a champ and seems to be pretty laid back at this point. My husband is home till the 20th when he will start his new job. We are being blessed with meals from our church (thank you guys) and so grateful for this new chapter God is starting in our lives
We are enjoying a special time as a family. It really hit home that I had another baby when we returned from the hospital to our own home. I just wept as I saw my two older children kissing and loving on their new baby brother. To top it all off my eight year old daughter, upon seeing Eli the first time said "Mama, Eli looks just like Jonah". I would have to agree with her, to me it was just another display of God's kindness.


Melanie said...

I can't wait to meet Eli!!!! God has been so kind to you.
Every baby we've had since the twins we have thought looked like Anna Marie. I don't know if it is because they really did look like her or if she was always on the forefront of our thoughts when we looked at their fresh little faces.

Stephanie @ Keeper of the Home said...

God is so good! He is just beautiful, and I cannot wait to meet him! God really has done amazing things in your life this past year. Not necessarily what you would have planned, I'm sure. :) But I have definitely seen Him at work through it all, and so much through little Eli's coming and now his arrival.
Praise God! And enjoy these precious early days with your sweet little man!

Jorge and Karen Silva said...

Thanks so much for sharing that...you made me cry!!

Oh, and I love the name you picked out!!

Love and hugs!!

Kama @ Today's Housewife said...

Hi--what a sweet baby. You asked a question on my blog today about the boxes. I believe you can do any type of box--even if it's coated. You could always try! On the wooden stool that I did, I believe I varnished it with a clear coat instead of glue so it would last longer. Just wanted to share!

Rebeca said...

Congratulations! What a lovely little boy, and what an enormous blessing! Praising God with you! And enjoy every moment- they go by so very fast!

lindafay said...

He is adorable!

Stacy said...

Praising God with you!

What a wonderful post.