Monday, July 30, 2007

Blog Slump?

I am posting to talk about why I am not posting! LOL! I have so much running through my mind BUT lack the articulation to actually put it in coherent words. I have had no motivation to plan next years school because I moved twice in 5 months and was tired. Now that we are pregnant (so grateful) I am highly motivated by the expectation that I will get sick around 8-9 weeks. That leaves me about 2 weeks to get all the shelves and closets organized and plan next years school. Our yard is a disaster needing to be weeded and trimmed. All work left by the last tenant. I think I am whining?
I also think without the school schedule I get less done....know what I mean? When I have something to accomplish laid out before me I just work harder. I am considering starting school early for that reason. I also have been composing the next Sovereignty Chronicles in my mind forever. I hope to post it this week.

There's my post to talk about not posting. :o)

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Tender Mercies .....on a Monday Morning

It is a wonderful thing to wake and be greeted by mercy and kindness. Though it is there everyday there are moments I am more aware of it then others. This past Monday was one of those days. I was unexpectedly surprised by undeserving grace.

It really started in April of 2000 when God blessed us with a beautiful baby girl who has become the light of our lives. In His kindness he blessed us with a child. She is now seven and reading away in the other room. Our second child, a son....and equal blessing arrived in April 2002. Through God's perfect plan he went to be with the Lord shortly after birth (more Sovereignty Chronicles to come). After much sorrow God allowed a third bundle of joy to arrive in August 2003 who we affectionately call "Buster Bar Superstar"......his real name means joy and laughter. We faced many complications with this son too, but God in His kindness allowed him to stay. What undeserved grace and mercy! Our fourth little person....a girl.... left due to miscarriage at 11 weeks in 2005. Then the wait......

We had conceived 4 times in 5 years and for over a year nothing. Symptoms started to show and I was diagnosed with PCOS.....which causes infertility. Our only option was to take drugs to help my body do it's thing. I cried in sorrow but God in his kindness turned my heart toward Him and called me to trust. We sought help. It failed.

So this takes us to Monday morning.....I rolled out of bed at 6:20am. Saw the test on the counter and felt like I was wasting my money. I was 5 days surprise with PCOS. I went through the motions knowing the end many times had I done this before? To my shock one line started to show and then the second. I started to laugh out loud....I didn't know what else to do. I hadn't taken any fertility drugs this month. I chuckled in disbelief. What mercy and kindness! I don't deserve this....who am I that He would love me like this and give me such treasure. I have dear friends who cannot have children.....why do I get this blessing? I don't know except that He is kind, He is good, He is the giver of all good things.
So God has blessed us with our 5th little baby. I have no idea what the outcome will be but I do know God is sovereign and good. That's all I need to know.

Friday, July 20, 2007

The Story Behind the Song: It is Well With My Soul

I came across this video from YouTube at
This song and story has been a tremendous encouragement to me over the last 5 years.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Breaking a bad habit.

I enjoy reading but I have a very bad habit of reading to many books at once. I typically have 5 books going at one time but I feel that I benefit less from what I am reading because it takes me so long to finish each book. I confess I am a "mood reader". What I mean, is I like to read different genres depending on the day. I remember reading something I think by C.J. Mahaney....that it is better to read one book and apply it to your life then to read many and do nothing with them. Though I wouldn't say I do nothing with the books I read, I could definitely benefit more from reading less at one time. So my plan is to allow my self only 3 books at a time. This doesn't mean I have to read three but that I can't read more than that. One of these books will be a biography or fiction. I like to have a book I can read anywhere or be interrupted and it doesn't matter. When I am reading a book that is teaching me truth I like to be uninterrupted. I tend to read those in the evenings or after my quiet time if the kids are still sleeping. I also enjoy reading something worth meditating on before I exercise.....then I can spend that half hour focusing my thoughts in that way. I love reading Spurgeon in the morning!

So here are the three books I am reading now.

From Grief to Glory by James W. Bruce given to me as a gift by my friend Melanie. Grief has become a part of my life since the death of our son and our struggle with secondary infertility. God has used it to build intimacy with himself...for my good and His glory! This book shares the stories of those who grieved like Luther, Spurgeon, Calvin and more.

I am also reading Helper By Design by Elyse Fitzpatrick. I want to be reading books that will grow me in my marriage and parenting. I have just started this book recently. I hope to post about it every chapter or two. It has questions at the end for thought and application. She even asks you to summarize each chapter in writing for your own benefit.

Lastly I am reading a biography called Leaving the Saints by Martha Beck. She grew up in the Mormon church and it tells the story of why she left.

I am also looking for some good fiction to explore. I enjoy historical fiction but not when it is mostly based around romance. I am not really into science-fiction unless it has strong character development and plot. Any suggestions for fiction are welcome!

Monday, July 16, 2007

Five reasons I love Jesus.

Tracy over at Bizzy House tagged me....I am to post five reasons I love Jesus. This one is not hard to do.

I love Jesus:

* because he took the wrath I deserved onto himself. He paid the once for all price for my sin and eternal life. This still amazes me on a regular basis!

* because he sympathizes in my weakness and understands all my temptation and provides help in my time of need.

* because He is the same, yesterday, today and forever.......He is never shifting sand or unreliable....He always shows up!

* because He provides the forgiveness I am in need of so badly each and everyday. I am not treated as my sins deserve.

* because He is The Sovereign One.....working and orchestrating all for my good and His glory...even the hard stuff.

Rockin' Girl Blogger

I was nominated for a Rockin' Girl Blogger by Heather at Stepping Heavenward. A bit humbled I might add! She deemed me her cyber-twin.....I count it as an honor.
Many of the people I would nominate have already received this award. I also have no idea how to get the little icon onto my blog....yes I am still technically needy :o)

I am passing this onto one person.......Melanie at Motherhood Apologia. I love Mel's blog mostly because I really like her (we know each other IRL). Secondly I enjoy how she processes, thinks and writes her posts. She is a women who loves her family and doctrine. I love that combo in a person! Anyway.... you Rock Melanie!

I think you are supposed to nominate 5 more blogs that you think rock. It is up to you if you participate.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Hot, Hot, Hot

Where I live we don't have air conditioning because for the most part you don't need it. We typically have mild winters and summers. Today it is supposed to reach 37 C....which for my American friends is 98.6 F. The only air conditioning in my world is the mall.
I can feel the heat radiating from my computer. I am even contemplating sneaking in the kiddy pool when my kids are in their quiet times :o).

Monday, July 09, 2007

What kind of Blogger?

I came across this blogger personality quiz at Eclectic Education. This is two quizzes in a row....must just be quiz week for me :o) I am curious to see what personality all my blogger friends will be......leave a comment or link with your results.

I am not so sure I agree with everything it says about me though I would like too! I definitely do agree that I am not concerned about the popularity of my blog. I thought it would bother me when I first started but it doesn't.

Your Blogging Type is Confident and Insightful

You've got a ton of brain power, and you leverage it into brilliant blog.
Both creative and logical, you come up with amazing ideas and insights.
A total perfectionist, you find yourself revising and rewriting posts a lot of the time.
You blog for yourself - and you don't care how popular (or unpopular) your blog is!

Saturday, July 07, 2007


Leslie over at Lux Venit posted this little quiz. This is me.....plain ole cup of Joe....who's Joe? :o)

You Are a Plain Ole Cup of Joe
But don't think plain - instead think, uncomplicated. You're a low maintenance kind of girl... who can hang with the guys Down to earth, easy going, and fun! Yup, that's you: the friend everyone invites. And your dependable too. Both for a laugh and a sympathetic ear.

Thursday, July 05, 2007

The Sovereignty Chronicles - Chapter 2

I don't really recall much of what I said to Jen when we arrived home. We didn't say a word the entire drive home. What would we say? The next few days were a blur. Waiting four days to get appointments to specialists at a children's hospital that was a two hour ferry ride away....was torture. I still thought they made a mistake.....they must have?

We arrived at Children's Hospital to be greeted by a genetic counselor, then a 2 hour ultrasound, then more genetic doctors and meetings then finally an amniocentesis. We were exhausted on every level. They listed all of the baby's issues in great detail with big words. They kept calling him a "lethal anomaly". I finally said I get it...could you please stop talking about my baby that way! They couldn't even bring themselves to acknowledge him as a person even though he moved through a two hour ultrasound like any other baby. He was a medical problem to them and nothing more.

We returned to our hotel room after two days of tests and meetings with doctors. We had to return home and take care of our two year old and needed another night to process all this. I couldn't sleep. I just began to cry out to God....really for the first time in a week. I laid my heart bare and I was flooded with peace... to my surprise. This is where the rubber met the road. Either my faith in God (really His faithfulness) was true and sure or I was going to loose it! I have never "felt" so desperate in my life and in need of being saved.

During that sweet time in the wee hours of the morning...this is where God started working on my heart. There are few distinct times in my life where I knew I "heard" God and this was one of them. I wrote in my journal:

"Rest Sandi, rest in me, this will bear fruit and I am with you"

Doesn't seem like much on paper but in that moment I was filled with faith.....not for a desired outcome to my circumstances but to know that He is faithful even when I couldn't be.
These were scriptures put on my heart that morning:

The Lord is good to all; he has compassion on all He has made.
Psalm 145:9

The Lord is faithful to all His promises and loving toward all He has made.
Psalm 145:13

The Lord is righteous in all His ways and loving toward all He has made.
Psalm 145:17

The Lord made my baby and through His sovereign plan had a reason for him being the way he was....though the world saw him as a problem with no value. I knew God was up to something but I had no idea how my faith and trust in God would be tested over the next year.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Celebration 2007

We've just returned this week from Celebration 2007. It was a family conference of four different churches within Sovereign Grace Ministries. We have worship, teaching, meals, games and fellowship together for the weekend. If there was anything I received from this weekend it was a fresh glimpse at my need for God. I was challenged to be more dependant and rely on God as my strength and comfort and not myself or other "things". One of my greatest temptations is self reliance and proceeding in my own knowledge and ability.

Every breath is a sign of his grace. Anything good is His spirit at work. I was so challenged to be more amazed by grace and not what I (think I) have accomplished or changed. It's all about Him!

I am working on Chapter 2 of the Sovereignty Chronicles. My husband is out of town for two weeks minus one my time is a bit more limited.