Monday, July 30, 2007
I also think without the school schedule I get less done....know what I mean? When I have something to accomplish laid out before me I just work harder. I am considering starting school early for that reason. I also have been composing the next Sovereignty Chronicles in my mind forever. I hope to post it this week.
There's my post to talk about not posting. :o)
Thursday, July 26, 2007
It really started in April of 2000 when God blessed us with a beautiful baby girl who has become the light of our lives. In His kindness he blessed us with a child. She is now seven and reading away in the other room. Our second child, a son....and equal blessing arrived in April 2002. Through God's perfect plan he went to be with the Lord shortly after birth (more Sovereignty Chronicles to come). After much sorrow God allowed a third bundle of joy to arrive in August 2003 who we affectionately call "Buster Bar Superstar"......his real name means joy and laughter. We faced many complications with this son too, but God in His kindness allowed him to stay. What undeserved grace and mercy! Our fourth little person....a girl.... left due to miscarriage at 11 weeks in 2005. Then the wait......
We had conceived 4 times in 5 years and for over a year nothing. Symptoms started to show and I was diagnosed with PCOS.....which causes infertility. Our only option was to take drugs to help my body do it's thing. I cried in sorrow but God in his kindness turned my heart toward Him and called me to trust. We sought help. It failed.
So this takes us to Monday morning.....I rolled out of bed at 6:20am. Saw the test on the counter and felt like I was wasting my money. I was 5 days late....no surprise with PCOS. I went through the motions knowing the end result....how many times had I done this before? To my shock one line started to show and then the second. I started to laugh out loud....I didn't know what else to do. I hadn't taken any fertility drugs this month. I chuckled in disbelief. What mercy and kindness! I don't deserve this....who am I that He would love me like this and give me such treasure. I have dear friends who cannot have children.....why do I get this blessing? I don't know except that He is kind, He is good, He is the giver of all good things.
So God has blessed us with our 5th little baby. I have no idea what the outcome will be but I do know God is sovereign and good. That's all I need to know.
Friday, July 20, 2007
I came across this video from YouTube at www.piecesofme-tina.blogspot.com.
This song and story has been a tremendous encouragement to me over the last 5 years.
Thursday, July 19, 2007
So here are the three books I am reading now.
From Grief to Glory by James W. Bruce given to me as a gift by my friend Melanie. Grief has become a part of my life since the death of our son and our struggle with secondary infertility. God has used it to build intimacy with himself...for my good and His glory! This book shares the stories of those who grieved like Luther, Spurgeon, Calvin and more.
I am also reading Helper By Design by Elyse Fitzpatrick. I want to be reading books that will grow me in my marriage and parenting. I have just started this book recently. I hope to post about it every chapter or two. It has questions at the end for thought and application. She even asks you to summarize each chapter in writing for your own benefit.
Lastly I am reading a biography called Leaving the Saints by Martha Beck. She grew up in the Mormon church and it tells the story of why she left.
I am also looking for some good fiction to explore. I enjoy historical fiction but not when it is mostly based around romance. I am not really into science-fiction unless it has strong character development and plot. Any suggestions for fiction are welcome!
Monday, July 16, 2007
I love Jesus:
* because he took the wrath I deserved onto himself. He paid the once for all price for my sin and eternal life. This still amazes me on a regular basis!
* because he sympathizes in my weakness and understands all my temptation and provides help in my time of need.
* because He is the same, yesterday, today and forever.......He is never shifting sand or unreliable....He always shows up!
* because He provides the forgiveness I am in need of so badly each and everyday. I am not treated as my sins deserve.
* because He is The Sovereign One.....working and orchestrating all for my good and His glory...even the hard stuff.
Many of the people I would nominate have already received this award. I also have no idea how to get the little icon onto my blog....yes I am still technically needy :o)
I am passing this onto one person.......Melanie at Motherhood Apologia. I love Mel's blog mostly because I really like her (we know each other IRL). Secondly I enjoy how she processes, thinks and writes her posts. She is a women who loves her family and doctrine. I love that combo in a person! Anyway.... you Rock Melanie!
I think you are supposed to nominate 5 more blogs that you think rock. It is up to you if you participate.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
I can feel the heat radiating from my computer. I am even contemplating sneaking in the kiddy pool when my kids are in their quiet times :o).
Monday, July 09, 2007
I came across this blogger personality quiz at Eclectic Education. This is two quizzes in a row....must just be quiz week for me :o) I am curious to see what personality all my blogger friends will be......leave a comment or link with your results.
I am not so sure I agree with everything it says about me though I would like too! I definitely do agree that I am not concerned about the popularity of my blog. I thought it would bother me when I first started but it doesn't.
|Your Blogging Type is Confident and Insightful|
You've got a ton of brain power, and you leverage it into brilliant blog.
Both creative and logical, you come up with amazing ideas and insights.
A total perfectionist, you find yourself revising and rewriting posts a lot of the time.
You blog for yourself - and you don't care how popular (or unpopular) your blog is!
Saturday, July 07, 2007
Leslie over at Lux Venit posted this little quiz. This is me.....plain ole cup of Joe....who's Joe? :o)
|You Are a Plain Ole Cup of Joe|
Thursday, July 05, 2007
We arrived at Children's Hospital to be greeted by a genetic counselor, then a 2 hour ultrasound, then more genetic doctors and meetings then finally an amniocentesis. We were exhausted on every level. They listed all of the baby's issues in great detail with big words. They kept calling him a "lethal anomaly". I finally said I get it...could you please stop talking about my baby that way! They couldn't even bring themselves to acknowledge him as a person even though he moved through a two hour ultrasound like any other baby. He was a medical problem to them and nothing more.
We returned to our hotel room after two days of tests and meetings with doctors. We had to return home and take care of our two year old and needed another night to process all this. I couldn't sleep. I just began to cry out to God....really for the first time in a week. I laid my heart bare and I was flooded with peace... to my surprise. This is where the rubber met the road. Either my faith in God (really His faithfulness) was true and sure or I was going to loose it! I have never "felt" so desperate in my life and in need of being saved.
During that sweet time in the wee hours of the morning...this is where God started working on my heart. There are few distinct times in my life where I knew I "heard" God and this was one of them. I wrote in my journal:
"Rest Sandi, rest in me, this will bear fruit and I am with you"
Doesn't seem like much on paper but in that moment I was filled with faith.....not for a desired outcome to my circumstances but to know that He is faithful even when I couldn't be.
These were scriptures put on my heart that morning:
The Lord is good to all; he has compassion on all He has made.
The Lord is faithful to all His promises and loving toward all He has made.
The Lord is righteous in all His ways and loving toward all He has made.
The Lord made my baby and through His sovereign plan had a reason for him being the way he was....though the world saw him as a problem with no value. I knew God was up to something but I had no idea how my faith and trust in God would be tested over the next year.
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Every breath is a sign of his grace. Anything good is His spirit at work. I was so challenged to be more amazed by grace and not what I (think I) have accomplished or changed. It's all about Him!
I am working on Chapter 2 of the Sovereignty Chronicles. My husband is out of town for two weeks minus one day...so my time is a bit more limited.